It’s now a few days after the beach, and I am hard at work. I am trying to decide on new business cards, getting a room ready for Reiki sessions with a couple of clients I’ll see later today, moving the hose around my much beloved and rather parched garden, and returning business calls, all pretty much at the same time.
I don’t feel at one with myself, much less with everyone and everything else.
I am left with the question that has rubbed us humans the wrong way ever since the first human got ticked off at the second human: Why can’t I stay in love with everyone and everything, with that lovely feeling of being one? Or to put it another way, why is my default mode so often one of feeling separate, even isolated and lonely? Not feeling whole and at one even within myself?
I’ve been around on this beautiful blue planet long enough to know that those why questions are usually less helpful than the “is there anything I can do about this?” questions. I take myself out onto my back porch and write in my journal (yes, the kind with a gorgeous Italian leather binding, quality paper that feels good under a pen, and the heavenly old-fashioned smell of book) and let my Self remind me of things that have helped in the past.
Here are a few I’ll share with you, thinking they might come in handy.
I remind myself that everything, always, starts with the breath. Every time I remember to take a big, conscious breath, I automatically feel the jagged edges soften inside me. The world around me comes into better focus, and it all seems less daunting.
It also helps to repeat a phrase about love. In his classic The Greatest Salesman in the World, Og Mandino suggests we repeat daily, “I will greet this day with love in my heart.” As you recall, I like to focus on the present moment, so I take out the word “will.”
I greet this day with love in my heart.
I have worked sporadically on learning Italian for a number of years (don’t ask how long.) And believe me, affirmations and useful phrases are more fun in a foreign language. That’s my belief, and I’m sticking to it.
Saluto questo giornata con amore nel mia cuore.
(Please, any REAL Italian speakers out there, if I’m making some egregious error, comment on this post pronto!)
Just thinking this phrase makes me smile, and saying it out loud fills me with glee. It’s so lovely, mellifluous. I feel more loving already.
I also remind myself about love songs.
Years ago my friend David and my sister Maeve came up with the nutty notion that we can increase the good energies on the planet by singing love songs to everyone and everything. And for all occasions. We found that for some reason, it seems to improve situations even when people don’t know we’ve been singing to them.
Example: Maeve, who is often painfully shy, sings “Getting to Know You,” to herself before meeting our new dentist for the first time. She relaxes and the visit goes extremely well. Brava, Maeve!
Example: I sing “It had to be moon glow. . .” while brushing my hair and thinking about my neighbor, with whom I’m about to have a talk about the persistent loud noises (music?) coming from their home at all hours night after night. This conversation has never helped before, but this time the music gets turned off by 11 that night, and almost every night thereafter. Hmmm.
Example: David sings a love song (I won’t tell you which) in the car before going in to talk with bankers about a business loan which they’ve pretty much told him over the phone he can’t have. He gets it. Honest.
I’m not saying you can count on a love song having a particularly good effect – except of course making the singer feel better. Really, isn’t that enough?
Everybody knows some love songs, and if you don’t know all the lyrics, you can make ’em up or just la-la-la. After all, it’s apparently the energy, or vibe, that’s helping the moment be sweeter, or at least less fraught with angst.
Another thing I remind myself is that, in another realm we may remember continuously that it’s all about the love, yet on this earthly time-space continuum, it’s ebb and flow. We remember, we forget, we go up, we go down, and Love says it’s all good. We need to let ourselves be human and love ourselves with all our ebbing and flowing. We need to repeat sweet Italian phrases to ourselves and sing ourselves love songs. After all, the kinder we treat our own dear selves, the kinder we are likely to be to each other, and the easier it will be to remember, once again, that
we are all one, and the thread connecting us is LOVE.
There. I feel better. You?